Tuesday, April 10, 2012


I recently went on a tangent on Twitter about how others who have never had a weight issue feel obligated to suggest to others what they need to do about their weight.  Some “smaller” people think that losing weight can happen overnight.  “All you have to do is eat right and exercise and then you will see the weight fade away” says the skinny girl with high metabolism who has never in her life had a roll (the ones on your back, not on your plate).  On this post, I dub myself as the unofficial spokeswoman for the thicker girls who have had a constant battle with their weight.  Here are just a few tips that will help you talk (or not talk) to a thicker woman about her weight:

1.       If you are not a doctor, do not start jumping on people about their weight.  Sometimes people that do this are not always sensitive about their approach.  You could really be hurting somebody’s feelings if you do not watch how your words come out.

2.       Big people know they are big; we do not need anybody to make this known to us.  We do not need your “Girl, when did you pick up all that weight? Did you have a baby?” Believe me when I say we are reminded that we are a little on the heavy side every time we suck in to button up a pair of jeans.

3.       Most of us are trying to make an effort.  Rather you know this or not, most of us are trying to do better with our health.  As a family and consumer science major, I took a lot of nutritious classes and I know you have to make lifestyle changes.  Losing weight is more than just taking a pill or drinking some special shake (both of which I do not trust).  Losing weight means making a pattern of preparing a meal at home versus eating out and exercising most days of the week.  These changes for some take awhile to make permanent. 

4.       We are allowed a treat every now and again.  “Smaller” folks believe that all bigger people can eat is rice cakes and carrot sticks.  And when these “smaller” people see bigger people eating anything else, they start to judge.  I believe that anything is okay in moderation.  It is important that fruits and vegetables make up a huge part of the diet but it is okay to have a cupcake every once in awhile. 

5.       We should not be stressed out about our weight.  My weight has been something I have battled with all my life.  I have come to the decision that I will lose weight at my own pace.  I will only lose weight for myself and no one else and that includes family, friends, or a man.  Since it is my weight, I will deal with it as I see fit.  When you stress a woman out about her weight it does not help her but hinders her.  In some cases, it could affect her self-esteem.

I do not believe all “smaller” people mean to hurt thick people but some just do not care.  Encouragement is fine but be aware of what you say.  What you find as words of encouragement could be words of destruction.

Also if you are not already follow me on twitter, @EbonyMarieRe.  I might have some other tangents in the future. 

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