Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Why Does Torrei Hart have to be Bitter?

I’m just going to get straight to the point: stop calling Torrei Hart bitter.  Reality TV have conditioned us to see all ex-wives as crazy and we start lumping them all into one group.  We have all seen the ex-wives who live lavish lives because of alimony and/or child support checks.  So we make quick judgments about all Hollywood ex’s and call them jaded and greedy.  However, I’m not going to put Torrie is this category because homegirl is just being honest. 

Torrei has made news throughout social media because of the uncanny way she speaks about her ex-husband, Kevin Hart.  Back in April 2014, she was asked about how she felt about Kevin calling his girlfriend “my rib”.  Ms. Hart kept it all the way real and responded with:

"It's easy to be somebody's rib when their millionaire."
Of course, the interwebs went crazy and went on a “she’s bitter female dog” campaign.  But let’s go on to what else she had to say after that comment:

“You’re working at City Sports and I’m taking you to your shows, you’re driving my car, you’re crashing my car several times, and I’m still there for you, supporting you, went out and got a job for the phone company and still making sure I got your back so you can pursue your dreams…That’s what ribs do!”

Some might say she is living in the past but what I hear is someone who is telling her truth.  Kanye said it best with this lyric in Gold Digger, “And when you get on he leave yo a—for white girl.” or in this case, mixed girl.  She was there when we didn’t know what a Kevin Hart was.  She made huge sacrifices so he could live out a dream that she probably doubted at times.  Why is it that when she tells her side of the story, she has to sugarcoat it and give old tired PR responses?
Just this past week, Kevin Hart proposed to girlfriend, Eniko Parish.  Because he did it on the night that Vh1’s Atlanta Exes premiered starring Torrei Hart, some said that it was a blow at her.  Kevin has said that he did it that night because it was Eniko’s birthday.  When asked if she thought if Kevin would cheat on Eniko, Torrei responded,Well he cheated on me..."  
I congratulate her for being honest.  We, as women, constantly put our feelings aside, heck, bury them 6 feet under.  We, too often, blame ourselves for every wrong thing in our past instead of placing blame where it needs to go.  We continue to put up a front when we are actually breaking down on the inside.  It’s almost like women aren’t allowed to be angry or hurt.  God forbid, we act like humans.  We are just supposed to suck it up, smile, and keep it moving.  But the moment we tell our truths, we are bitter, angry, or “stuck in the past.”  Torrei Hart isn’t stuck in the past, she is stuck on the truth.  He got on, cheated on her, and now gives new girl all the praise and glory. 
Before you start calling me a feminist Nazi, I know there are two sides to every story.  He has admitted to his wrong doings and constantly wishes Torrei well.   Torrei has even admitted to the part she played in their divorce.   In fact, I’m actually a huge fan of Kevin Hart.  My point is that being classy doesn’t mean that she has to hide her feelings about what she has gone through.  Anybody that has gone through a break-up will tell you that you may move forward but the scars are always there.  Unlike most ex-wives, Torrei has to constantly see her husband professing his love to new girl.  So the healing process is a bit different from the average ex-wife. 
Only time will tell how Torrei will continue to speak of Kevin and Eniko.  Since she is doing this reality show maybe interviewers will stop only asking her questions about Kevin and more about herself. 
How do you feel about how Torrei responds to Kevin’s new relationship?

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